DEAR ZZINA POWER: I GOT to know my lover online, met her just twice, had bonked once, and five weeks on I’m panicking because she’s pregnant.
She is adamant she is keeping the baby and I feel I’ve lost all control of my life.
I’m 27 and work as a chef in a pub. I love the job but the hours are long and unsociable, so I don’t have many chances to meet women.
I’ve been single for a year so thought I would try my luck in online chat rooms. It didn’t take long to find someone who seemed perfect.
At first we were just chatting. I liked her a lot and so after a month, she suggested we meet. She’s 25.
We went out for a few drinks and got on brilliantly. A week later I invited her round to mine for dinner.
I have a small flat and we’d only eaten our starters before she made a move on me.
She came around to my side of the table and sat on top of me, kissing me. We ended up having romping there and then, on the table.
I finally cooked the main course — steak and chips — at midnight.
We arranged to meet again when she returned from a three-week training course but now she has dropped this bombshell.
I don’t know what to do. It is way too soon.
My lover told me she could never contemplate an abortion and says she would never forgive herself.
I know we should have used protection but in the heat of the moment we didn’t think.
In my heart, I know I am not ready to have a child. Part of me is wondering whether I am the dad.
ZZINA POWER SAYS: It sounds like you should have stayed in the kitchen – or at least put a condom on. Unfortunately you don’t know this woman at all.
She has told you she is pregnant and if she decides to keep the baby this really is down to her.
Suggest you meet for a face-to-face chat. Ask what she plans to do about the pregnancy and whether she’s thought it all through.
My support pack Unplanned Pregnancy can help both of you to look at her options.
Tell her you are not ready for the commitment but if you are the dad, you’ll do the right thing by the child.
Please insist on a DNA test once the baby is born.
Enock Mugabi aka iWitness is a Journalist, Seasoned Writer and Music Analyst with a passion for sports.
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